I am Seriously Disillusioned

Last night I learned something that turned my life upside down. The truth was revealed to me, and I thought maybe it was all a practical joke, designed to make me feel like some inferior life form. Kind of like pond scum.

But ... Alas! It was not so.

My life has been lived in ignorance, wrongly believing in how babies are made. I thought to make a baby [BZZZZZZ!! INTERRUPTION/DISCLAIMER- Please scroll to the end of the blog for a happy picture of unicorns and walruses if you cannot handle blood, "the time of the month", birth, or dragons] you had to "do the deed" when it was that time of the month.

I could never understand how anyone had children that way, unless they were seriously sick in the head and loved the idea of swimming in blood. So I ignorantly thought most babies were happy mistakes. I was wrong.

Last night, my mom said she didn't realize people could get pregnant on their periods. WOAH. I was shocked. Though thoroughly confused, I played it off like, "Yeah. I know right? TOTALLY WACKO," while in my head, it felt like a thousand dragons simultaneously spontaneously combusted.

I had thought all along it was the only way. Sigh. I am always wrong.

My health class must have been boring.